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Spreading
happiness throughout the world TM |
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Happiness
Through Honorable Actions Copyright 2005 by Julian
Kalmar. All rights reserved. (802 words) Do you want to live with a strong sense of peacefulness,
happiness, goodness, and self-respect? The collection of happiness actions* broadly categorized as “honor” help you create
this life of good feelings. As the American Heritage Dictionary defines it, honor is
“Personal integrity maintained without legal or other obligation.” It’s a
deep sense of rightness in our choice of actions. However, this sense of
rightness does not display itself as ugly self-righteous behavior. It is a
quiet personal experience of rightness that leads to a lasting sense of
well-being. Here’s an example to show how honorable actions create
happiness. Say a store clerk fails to charge us for an item. If we
don’t say anything, we receive an immediate reward, don’t we? We feel excited
by our good fortune, and could leave the store with a sense of glee. We made
no mistake and we made no effort to cheat them. So, why not allow the error
to benefit us? It seems we would still be able to respect ourselves
afterwards. To discover why we should take honorable action, we need
only play out each possible future. If we keep silent, and profit from the clerk’s mistake, we
would leave the store with adrenaline coursing through our veins; we would
get away with something. We would drive home with a sense of sneaky
excitement. Later we might tell our spouses or friends about our good
fortune. On the other hand, if we tell the clerk about the
uncharged item, the clerk would be grateful and thank us for our honesty. We
would leave the store with a quiet sense of honor that we might never share
with another soul. In the first case, where we don’t tell the clerk, a couple
of things would happen. Deep down inside we would know ourselves as a type of
thief, as evidenced by our sneaky excitement. In the process, we would lose
some peace of mind and self-respect. We would also demonstrate that we cannot
be trusted, since we advertise our dishonor by telling our spouses and
friends. We tarnish our own reputations by telling others. In contrast, bringing the error to the clerk’s attention
causes different things to happen. Immediately the clerk knows us to be
honorable. They like us. They remember us thereafter and treat us well. Upon
leaving the store, we reflect on our sense of goodness. We feel honorable and
our self-respect is boosted. Our kindness to the clerk is reflected back to
us immediately and over the long term when they see us again. Whenever we take honorable action we gain the deep
internal rewards of self-respect, peace of mind, goodness, and a sense of
nobility. All of these greatly contribute to our sense of well-being.
Honorable actions create happiness. There is a beautiful positive cycle that is created by
living a life of honorable actions. Honorable thoughts lead to honorable
actions. Honorable actions lead us to a happier existence. And it’s easy to
again think and act honorably when we’re happy. Unfortunately, there is a negative version of this cycle.
Dishonorable thoughts lead to dishonorable actions that lead to pain and
unhappiness. Unhappiness leads to more dishonorable thoughts. So, strive for the positive cycle. While it can be
difficult to start, once it’s started, it’s easy to continue. The opportunities for expressing honor—and thus for
becoming happier—are all around us. In our work-lives we express honor by
always doing quality work, never leaving details unattended, working in the
company’s best interest, treating customers and employees well, never working
in a divisive spirit, and striving to promote harmony. In our larger lives we express honor through honest and
ethical actions, being punctual, doing what we promise, holding ourselves
accountable for our actions, treating others with respect, and so on.
Although the list is endless, the common theme is a sense of quiet rightness.
We feel quiet; at peace with our thoughts and actions. Many people look to books of laws, or religious teachings
to know what is honorable, but you can almost always tell honorable actions
by consulting your inner spirit. Simply ask yourself which course of action
creates the least internal and external turmoil in the long run. Predictions
of your mental quietude are good guides. Just as we did with the inattentive store clerk example,
ask yourself if you would be more or less peaceful; happier or unhappier in
the long run; more self-respecting or less; more honorable or not. If you always choose the honorable route, you are never
plagued by the fear of "being discovered" and no one can ever
threaten to expose your past. That brings the peace of mind essential for
genuine happiness. --- * Happiness actions
– the physical and mental actions that naturally and automatically create a
strong sense of well-being. Biographical Information
August 17th, 2005 Copyright 2005 by Julian Kalmar.
All rights reserved. |
